1 00:00:10,468 --> 00:00:12,178 Is that a fucking mosquito? 2 00:00:14,764 --> 00:00:15,849 Run! 3 00:00:25,525 --> 00:00:27,819 Fucking slimed me! 4 00:00:27,819 --> 00:00:29,446 I'm not a goddamn runner! 5 00:00:29,446 --> 00:00:32,073 I have flat feet and a super long torso! 6 00:00:34,951 --> 00:00:35,952 Shit! 7 00:00:44,627 --> 00:00:46,629 My skin is burning! 8 00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:56,723 CHERIE: What the hell? 9 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:59,225 You got 'squito saliva on you. 10 00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:01,186 Scrub it, or you'll itch for a week. 11 00:01:02,187 --> 00:01:04,189 Come with me if you want a larva. 12 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:08,693 You know, 'cause baby mosquitoes are larva, in the movie... 13 00:01:08,777 --> 00:01:10,945 Whatever. Just let's go, so you don't die. 14 00:01:11,821 --> 00:01:16,076 KORVO: Planet Shlorp was a perfect utopia until the asteroid hit. 15 00:01:16,951 --> 00:01:18,661 One hundred adults and their replicants 16 00:01:18,745 --> 00:01:21,664 were issued a Pupa and escaped into the space, 17 00:01:21,748 --> 00:01:24,167 searching for new homes on uninhabited worlds. 18 00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:27,295 We crashed on Earth, stranding us on an already overpopulated planet. 19 00:01:27,295 --> 00:01:29,339 That's right. I've been talking this whole time. 20 00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,299 I'm the one holding the Pupa. My name's Korvo. 21 00:01:31,299 --> 00:01:33,093 This is my show. I just dropped the Pupa. 22 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,928 Do you see me? This is ridiculous. 23 00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:38,056 I hate Earth. It's a horrible home. People are stupid and confusing. 24 00:01:38,056 --> 00:01:40,100 Why do you let Tom Cruise do all his own stunts? 25 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:41,601 He's gonna get himself killed. 26 00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:44,729 Mr. Cruise, if you're within the sound of my voice, scale it back. 27 00:01:44,813 --> 00:01:46,689 You're the greatest entertainer ever. 28 00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:48,650 I'm sure your beliefs are reasonable, too. 29 00:01:48,650 --> 00:01:49,818 I haven't looked into it. 30 00:02:19,013 --> 00:02:22,308 The winner of the house smoothie challenge is... Terry! 31 00:02:22,392 --> 00:02:24,394 - Yes, biatches! I only use vodka! - What? 32 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:26,896 In what world does my hot meatloaf smoothie not win? 33 00:02:26,980 --> 00:02:29,149 Taste it again! That's real ass butter, son! 34 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,153 - Eat meatloaf, monster! - Please, stop! 35 00:02:33,695 --> 00:02:36,823 Jesse! What the hell happened to our Emily in Paris bodysuit? 36 00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:40,285 Guys, I was undercover in the human suit when I overheard huge news! 37 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,412 There's a Ray Donovan cast reunion? 38 00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:44,164 - No. - Then what the fuck, Jesse? 39 00:02:44,164 --> 00:02:47,250 There I was, doing hard, investigative journalism, 40 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:49,794 on why humans like hummus, and then suddenly... 41 00:02:49,878 --> 00:02:51,588 KORVO: Snore, skip to the end. 42 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:55,258 JESSE: I heard that our town might be listed by Parade magazine 43 00:02:55,258 --> 00:02:57,510 as one of the ten nicest places to live! 44 00:02:57,594 --> 00:02:59,137 And the judges are coming this week! 45 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:01,598 KORVO: Don't care! This is a horrible use of a flashback! 46 00:03:01,598 --> 00:03:05,226 And our family was not invited to the giant town photo! 47 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:06,436 What the hell? 48 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,813 We weren't invited to something? Now, I fucking care! 49 00:03:08,897 --> 00:03:10,440 Hold up. Everyone, hold your butts. 50 00:03:10,440 --> 00:03:13,359 You're sure they're talking about the Solars, or was it the Kohlers, 51 00:03:13,443 --> 00:03:15,069 those kitchen sink CEOs down the block? 52 00:03:15,153 --> 00:03:18,114 Because last time I checked, this town straight up loves us. 53 00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,033 We settled this with Nanobot Man. 54 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,826 Remember? The "people liking us" stuff? 55 00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:24,078 And I'm basically the moral center of this town! 56 00:03:24,162 --> 00:03:26,247 That's why I gave the mayor my Yum-Signal, 57 00:03:26,331 --> 00:03:28,750 in case they ever need my vigilante services. 58 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:34,839 You're the moral center of dick. And Jesse, your sources suck. 59 00:03:34,964 --> 00:03:36,841 Why are we paying for that journalism MBA 60 00:03:36,925 --> 00:03:38,134 from Grand Canyon University? 61 00:03:38,218 --> 00:03:39,928 It's true! People are afraid of us 62 00:03:39,928 --> 00:03:42,680 'cause we're always zapping them into random things! 63 00:03:42,764 --> 00:03:45,391 Zapping? Please. I don't zap. Name one time. 64 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:48,478 When you turned people who love dinner parties into bottles of wine. 65 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:50,021 Look at how tight my calves were. 66 00:03:50,021 --> 00:03:53,191 And remember Terry turning Red Goobler's fiance into a rat? 67 00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:54,692 Who is framing these? 68 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:56,611 That was a couple of losers who deserved it. 69 00:03:56,611 --> 00:03:59,197 The idea that the entire town is scared of us is batshit. 70 00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:00,615 Watch. I'll prove it to you. 71 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:03,910 See? The mailman is delivering our mail like he does for everybody. 72 00:04:04,035 --> 00:04:06,996 From a safe distance with an LA Sparks-branded T shirt cannon. 73 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:08,248 What up, Franklin? 74 00:04:08,248 --> 00:04:11,292 Please don't turn me into horsey sauce like you did to Doug, 75 00:04:11,376 --> 00:04:12,627 who used to have this route! 76 00:04:12,627 --> 00:04:14,754 Maybe Doug shouldn't have crinkled the magazines! 77 00:04:14,754 --> 00:04:16,130 I'm sensing a pattern. 78 00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:18,132 Those guys wearing Judas Priest shirts 79 00:04:18,216 --> 00:04:20,301 crossed the street only after they saw us. 80 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:22,553 And this is why planes never fly over our house? 81 00:04:22,637 --> 00:04:24,305 Harrison Ford has crashed into every yard 82 00:04:24,389 --> 00:04:26,349 on this street except ours! 83 00:04:26,891 --> 00:04:30,270 Did you guys ever notice how the Pupa only has away game play dates? 84 00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:31,646 Wait a fucking minute! 85 00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:35,525 Is that DoorDash guy delivering food straight to Kevin's door? 86 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:36,985 I thought the "Dash" was on us! 87 00:04:36,985 --> 00:04:39,570 I always pick it up from the DoorDash HQ in San Francisco. 88 00:04:39,654 --> 00:04:41,864 The ramen turns into a cold brick when I get home. 89 00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,283 Fam, we gotta fix this. 90 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:44,659 I want that hot dash! 91 00:04:44,659 --> 00:04:47,120 Jesse, you're always annoyingly preachy about kindness. 92 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:48,579 Teach us how not to be jerks. 93 00:04:48,663 --> 00:04:50,415 First lesson, say please! 94 00:04:50,415 --> 00:04:51,874 No! I'm the goddamn boss! 95 00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:54,460 Put a dime in that know-your-place jar, you snizz. 96 00:04:54,544 --> 00:04:56,379 This ain't gonna be easy. 97 00:04:57,463 --> 00:04:58,631 Hey, isn't this where we had 98 00:04:58,715 --> 00:05:00,383 our Shlorpian sexual harassment training? 99 00:05:00,383 --> 00:05:01,884 Who's that hot guy who ran it? 100 00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:04,178 Real strong shoulders, like cum gutters on the roof, 101 00:05:04,262 --> 00:05:05,847 - you know what I'm saying? - Listen up! 102 00:05:05,972 --> 00:05:08,766 I only have 23 hours to teach you some empathy 103 00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:11,561 before Parade magazine judges this town. 104 00:05:13,229 --> 00:05:16,024 This is a paintball gun that represents our sci-fi race. 105 00:05:16,024 --> 00:05:18,026 Repeat after me, I will not use this. 106 00:05:19,319 --> 00:05:21,237 I need more paintballs, woman! 107 00:05:21,529 --> 00:05:22,613 Please? 108 00:05:24,615 --> 00:05:27,035 Okay, Korvo. You're at a car shop. 109 00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:29,912 And this mechanic's gonna tell you what's wrong with your car. 110 00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:32,415 This piece of cardboard shit thinks he knows more than me? 111 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,584 We're just gonna listen to him. 112 00:05:34,709 --> 00:05:39,005 You see, when the warning light goes on, that means there is a problem. 113 00:05:39,005 --> 00:05:40,840 I know what a warning light is, cock-snot. 114 00:05:40,965 --> 00:05:44,344 JESSE: Ah-ah-ah! Patience! Remember, he's just trying to help! 115 00:05:44,344 --> 00:05:45,887 This here is your spark plug. 116 00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:48,306 You want me to write those words down for you? 117 00:05:48,556 --> 00:05:49,557 Bitch! 118 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:50,850 JESSE: Hear him out! 119 00:05:51,976 --> 00:05:53,561 That'll be $300. 120 00:05:56,439 --> 00:05:58,399 Okay. Terry. You're in an Uber pool. 121 00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:00,651 Wow! How frugal of me. I'm growing already. 122 00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:03,279 JESSE: All you need to do is make it across the room. 123 00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:04,864 Okay, I see what's happening. 124 00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:07,450 These Red Sox fans are gonna yammer on about Beantown, 125 00:06:07,450 --> 00:06:09,994 and you think I'll turn them into chowder or some shit. 126 00:06:10,078 --> 00:06:12,163 But joke's on you, kid, because I love Boston. 127 00:06:12,163 --> 00:06:15,208 That's why I got a "We Bought a Zoo" Matt Damon tattoo inside my lip. 128 00:06:15,208 --> 00:06:17,251 So start her up, Jesse. Give me your worst! 129 00:06:17,335 --> 00:06:20,254 Did you hear what happened at the end of Fast and Furious 10, 130 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:22,006 10 Fast 10 Furious? 131 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:23,383 Ah! No spoilers! Stop the car. 132 00:06:23,383 --> 00:06:24,884 JESSE: Stay calm, use your words! 133 00:06:24,884 --> 00:06:26,803 I heard Vinny Diesel steals a space shuttle. 134 00:06:26,803 --> 00:06:28,346 Remove your mouth from your faces! 135 00:06:28,346 --> 00:06:30,014 I couldn't believe they killed Hobbs. 136 00:06:30,098 --> 00:06:32,517 I will burn every last Dunkin' Donuts in this hemisphere, 137 00:06:32,517 --> 00:06:34,435 you Guinness blooded damn Apple hammers. 138 00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:42,110 JESSE: Okay, we're gonna make this real simple. 139 00:06:42,110 --> 00:06:43,903 Just order from the menu. 140 00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:45,988 I'd like a grilled cheese. 141 00:06:46,572 --> 00:06:48,282 - Please. - JESSE: That's the ticket! 142 00:06:48,366 --> 00:06:51,077 Would you like mozzarella? American? Provolone? 143 00:06:52,161 --> 00:06:53,579 Why would you do that? 144 00:06:53,663 --> 00:06:55,915 Come on! Cheddar wasn't even in their top three! 145 00:07:04,090 --> 00:07:06,259 Jesus. This was the prison level. 146 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,136 You can still see the tally marks. 147 00:07:08,136 --> 00:07:10,680 Oh, God, this guy only made it one day. 148 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:12,140 That's depressing. 149 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:15,476 Well, prisons in the time of The Duke? Yeah. But now, it's home. 150 00:07:15,560 --> 00:07:17,478 Come on, you must be starving. 151 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:18,813 What the hell are we doing? 152 00:07:18,813 --> 00:07:21,816 Do I need to remind you the last people we followed ate Joe Sanders? 153 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:23,192 Dude, that's the janitor. 154 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:25,027 He was one of the first people in the Wall. 155 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:26,112 - So? - So, 156 00:07:26,112 --> 00:07:28,322 he must know how to stop the mosquitoes. 157 00:07:28,489 --> 00:07:31,701 We did what we came to do. The power is on. Let's go home. 158 00:07:31,701 --> 00:07:33,744 And put my baby to sleep every night 159 00:07:33,828 --> 00:07:37,748 knowing that at any second a Dumpster Dracula could suck her dry? 160 00:07:37,832 --> 00:07:40,001 Fuck that! Who knows how many there are? 161 00:07:40,001 --> 00:07:42,044 Well, there's about 10 by your feet right now. 162 00:07:44,922 --> 00:07:46,132 How do we kill them all? 163 00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:48,843 You can't. I'll show you why. 164 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,263 Hell, no. Absolutely not. 165 00:07:55,057 --> 00:07:56,559 No goddamn respect. 166 00:07:56,559 --> 00:07:59,687 No one listens, fucking bugs spitting on me and shit. 167 00:08:00,813 --> 00:08:02,482 So, how'd we do? 168 00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:04,609 You all failed miserably! 169 00:08:04,609 --> 00:08:05,860 Uh, recount much? 170 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:08,571 Not one of you thought about another person's feelings! 171 00:08:08,696 --> 00:08:11,574 The Parade magazine judges will be here in a few hours! 172 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,038 Whatever. Who cares if we're not invited? 173 00:08:17,038 --> 00:08:18,539 I say we photobomb these losers. 174 00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:21,459 Hard agree. What if we turn everyone who was shitting on us 175 00:08:21,459 --> 00:08:22,752 into actual Polaroids? 176 00:08:22,752 --> 00:08:25,004 - I can whip up a ray gun that will... - Brill, Korvo. 177 00:08:25,004 --> 00:08:26,339 You leave me no choice. 178 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,217 I invoke Taron Egerten! 179 00:08:29,217 --> 00:08:30,718 You're banishing us? 180 00:08:30,718 --> 00:08:33,846 A Shlorpian can only invoke Taron Egerten once in a lifetime. 181 00:08:33,930 --> 00:08:36,182 You can't just willy-nilly invoke Taron Egerten. 182 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:38,768 We did it the first day we landed, now we can't invoke shite! 183 00:08:38,768 --> 00:08:40,603 I invoke! 184 00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:42,813 Don't do this, Jesse. Please! 185 00:08:42,897 --> 00:08:45,608 AISHA: Banished Shlorpians must remain in the brainwashing room 186 00:08:45,608 --> 00:08:47,068 for a full solar cycle. 187 00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:48,194 A year? 188 00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,112 Or until you assholes learn empathy. 189 00:08:50,196 --> 00:08:51,197 A year? 190 00:08:51,197 --> 00:08:54,575 Commencing sympathy re-education in three... 191 00:08:54,659 --> 00:08:55,952 Two... 192 00:08:56,994 --> 00:08:59,205 Stop! No! 193 00:08:59,914 --> 00:09:01,791 KORVO: Why is a puppy friends with an otter? 194 00:09:01,791 --> 00:09:03,000 They don't share a habitat. 195 00:09:03,084 --> 00:09:05,503 YUMYULACK: The rainbows! They burn my eyes! 196 00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:07,964 Now everyone in town can be who they want, 197 00:09:07,964 --> 00:09:10,383 without sci-fi messing up their life. 198 00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,676 Okay, I think it's over. 199 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:14,053 Oh, no! Babies discovering bubbles! 200 00:09:16,889 --> 00:09:19,183 Oh, God, no, Marlo! Marlo! Get back here! 201 00:09:19,308 --> 00:09:22,186 Not the aliens' house! Anywhere but the aliens' house! 202 00:09:22,270 --> 00:09:24,730 Shit, shit, shit! Oh, God! Oh, God! Oh, God! 203 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:26,941 Hi there, neighbs! 204 00:09:27,066 --> 00:09:30,486 Oh, God, I'm sorry! The leash slipped. Please don't tell Korvo. Oh, God! 205 00:09:30,570 --> 00:09:33,155 You don't have to worry about my family anymore. 206 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,657 They're all hella locked up. 207 00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:36,367 Have a fun day! 208 00:09:41,872 --> 00:09:43,416 Hey! Remember those dicks 209 00:09:43,416 --> 00:09:45,084 who turned me into a gummy bear? 210 00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:46,794 It was technically a Swedish Fish. 211 00:09:46,794 --> 00:09:48,462 I tried to bone you in the gummy butt. 212 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:50,631 It was the second craziest 9/11 of my life. 213 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:54,010 Well, they're all locked up! We can be jerks again. 214 00:09:58,014 --> 00:10:01,017 Jerks! 215 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:10,401 Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! Jerk! 216 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:21,203 Jerk, jerk, jerks! 217 00:10:22,913 --> 00:10:24,874 Now, generally, I'm a dark meat guy, 218 00:10:24,874 --> 00:10:28,252 but when it comes to 'squitoes, you want that sweet yellow meat. 219 00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:31,464 So you're kind of like Quint from Jaws, but for bugs. 220 00:10:31,631 --> 00:10:33,132 Hey, that's what I'm going for. 221 00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:34,675 I got bored making diaphragms 222 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:37,011 out of the lambskin scraps Yumyulack gives us. 223 00:10:37,011 --> 00:10:40,264 So, now I come down to the lower levels, catch a bug, go back up, 224 00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:41,641 sell its meat at the market. 225 00:10:41,641 --> 00:10:44,226 All this time, you thought you were eating turkey jerky. 226 00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:46,479 But no, that is grade-A mosquito. 227 00:10:46,604 --> 00:10:48,189 Mmm, this is good! 228 00:10:48,189 --> 00:10:50,358 Gotta use all parts of the ski buffalo. 229 00:10:50,358 --> 00:10:52,610 Steaks from the thorax. Netting from the wings. 230 00:10:52,610 --> 00:10:56,072 Check this out. Would you believe this hat used to be a mosquito's head? 231 00:10:56,072 --> 00:10:58,491 You can't fight nature. You gotta learn to live with it. 232 00:10:58,491 --> 00:11:01,327 I think the point of all humanity is that you don't. 233 00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:03,871 Take it from a first gen Wallian, and I've seen it all. 234 00:11:03,871 --> 00:11:05,831 We went from gum boys to the Tim era. 235 00:11:05,915 --> 00:11:07,833 Now we're blessed with mosquito protein. 236 00:11:07,958 --> 00:11:10,211 These disgusting monsters are our future. 237 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:14,965 This is how we rid ourselves of our reliance on the aliens' candy. 238 00:11:15,299 --> 00:11:18,719 This tastes just like a freshly microwaved Bob Evans. 239 00:11:18,803 --> 00:11:21,305 We gotta to convince Parliament to protect these bugs. 240 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:24,392 It's the only way the Wall can be in harmony with itself. 241 00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,187 Mmm. 242 00:11:28,187 --> 00:11:29,689 God damn it! 243 00:11:29,689 --> 00:11:31,232 Yeah, this is delicious. 244 00:11:37,571 --> 00:11:39,782 We've had a good run, Maddie. 245 00:11:39,782 --> 00:11:43,035 But this town no longer needs a Civic Responsibility manager. 246 00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:44,995 I can't believe my life's work was to create 247 00:11:45,079 --> 00:11:46,914 the world's first jerk monitoring system. 248 00:11:46,914 --> 00:11:48,416 And now I'll never get to use it. 249 00:11:48,416 --> 00:11:51,419 But now that we're up for top 10 nicest places to live, 250 00:11:51,419 --> 00:11:53,587 there are no more jerks to be monitored. 251 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:55,131 Do you want me to unplug it? 252 00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:56,716 Please. I can't bear it. 253 00:11:58,926 --> 00:12:00,219 Wait! 254 00:12:00,219 --> 00:12:03,180 The jerks! The jerks are filling up the streets! 255 00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:06,976 No, no! They aren't hiding anymore. The jerks are on the move. 256 00:12:07,810 --> 00:12:09,311 Get me the mayor! 257 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:10,896 If we don't act now, 258 00:12:10,980 --> 00:12:13,482 here's how many jerks will be out in 10 minutes, 259 00:12:13,649 --> 00:12:17,611 twenty minutes, and in an hour's time, we'll have completely lost our city. 260 00:12:17,737 --> 00:12:20,197 Oh, God! We might be too late. 261 00:12:20,281 --> 00:12:23,909 Kid Rock just announced he's bringing his "Make America Squirt Again" festival 262 00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:24,994 to our town! 263 00:12:24,994 --> 00:12:26,996 Well, I know what I need to do. 264 00:12:26,996 --> 00:12:29,582 I'm gonna sleep with my mistress in my own bed! 265 00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:31,083 Jerk! 266 00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:34,670 Wow. All this time the mayor was a jerk. That's a political first. 267 00:12:34,754 --> 00:12:36,589 It's up to us now, Maddie. 268 00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:41,093 Nope! It's up to you now. You're fat! Bye! 269 00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:44,096 The town is full of jerks and Parade Magazine is coming today! 270 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:46,766 We have to do something before they... 271 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:48,017 Oh, no! 272 00:12:48,893 --> 00:12:51,395 Oh, God! No! 273 00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,402 Hey, Bones Rider. 274 00:12:58,486 --> 00:13:00,070 Man, how long was I asleep? 275 00:13:00,154 --> 00:13:02,114 Those 'squito pupas really knocked me out. 276 00:13:02,198 --> 00:13:03,407 Whoa! What the hell? 277 00:13:03,491 --> 00:13:06,243 Your partner's lost her cool, haircut-head. Untie me. 278 00:13:06,660 --> 00:13:08,871 Hey, psycho! What's with the hostage? 279 00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:11,791 The janitor needed to be taken out of the equation. He'll be fine. 280 00:13:11,791 --> 00:13:13,876 We were his guests. What equation? 281 00:13:13,876 --> 00:13:16,670 "E" equals "kill every mosquito." 282 00:13:16,754 --> 00:13:18,422 What? We can feed the whole Wall. 283 00:13:18,506 --> 00:13:20,925 Anything that could hurt Pezlie needs to be destroyed. 284 00:13:20,925 --> 00:13:22,927 Jesus, Cherie. How many more people have to die 285 00:13:22,927 --> 00:13:24,804 because you have to nuke every threat? 286 00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,223 Well, maybe you could start helping with some threats. 287 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:30,518 - I thought you were a hero. - I've never wanted to be a hero! 288 00:13:30,518 --> 00:13:32,436 That's it. I'm done. I'm going home. 289 00:13:32,561 --> 00:13:34,897 You can't quit! We're partners! 290 00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:36,607 My wife is my partner. 291 00:13:36,607 --> 00:13:38,108 I never should've left her behind. 292 00:13:38,192 --> 00:13:39,652 Fine! Fuck it! 293 00:13:40,194 --> 00:13:41,487 - Go! - Don't you get it? 294 00:13:41,612 --> 00:13:44,615 There's always gonna be another battle. It'll never end! 295 00:13:44,615 --> 00:13:45,908 Then I'll keep fighting! 296 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:47,910 What's the point of fighting for your family 297 00:13:47,910 --> 00:13:50,037 if you never get to be with your family? 298 00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:53,290 Go home, Cherie. Before you make that baby an orphan. 299 00:13:58,671 --> 00:14:00,297 So this is where we are, huh? 300 00:14:00,381 --> 00:14:02,341 You're just like Tim and the Duke. 301 00:14:02,341 --> 00:14:04,176 You don't know shit about Ringo. 302 00:14:04,260 --> 00:14:07,680 We've been given a blessing, but you're too busy leading to see it. 303 00:14:07,680 --> 00:14:10,808 Liars, always holding on to power with your stupid lies. 304 00:14:10,933 --> 00:14:12,768 No, I got rid of all the liars. 305 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:15,479 If you think that, then you don't know who's lying to you. 306 00:14:15,563 --> 00:14:17,439 Oh, shut up. 307 00:14:21,819 --> 00:14:23,195 Hmm... Ugh! 308 00:14:23,279 --> 00:14:26,282 This would be so much easier if this wasn't so delicious. 309 00:14:31,912 --> 00:14:34,415 Okay, Pupa. Let's go get in that town photo. 310 00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:37,209 Now that the three biggest town jerks are locked in our ship, 311 00:14:37,293 --> 00:14:39,670 we can be free to... Ew! 312 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:51,599 Listen to this dream I had last night. 313 00:14:51,599 --> 00:14:54,768 It's super long, and you're totally not in it. 314 00:14:58,480 --> 00:14:59,773 What's happening? 315 00:14:59,857 --> 00:15:02,192 There's a lot of people around in summer scarves. 316 00:15:02,276 --> 00:15:05,195 Those aliens who turned us into iguanas last year are gone! 317 00:15:05,279 --> 00:15:09,450 We totally deserved it, too. But now the jerks are back, baby! 318 00:15:11,911 --> 00:15:13,871 Oh, no! I was wrong! 319 00:15:13,871 --> 00:15:15,664 Korvo, Terry and Yum weren't the problem. 320 00:15:15,748 --> 00:15:17,249 They were the solution! 321 00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:20,669 I tried arson but it backfired! 322 00:15:20,794 --> 00:15:22,379 Oh, God, no! 323 00:15:30,095 --> 00:15:31,138 Hey! Emily in Paris! 324 00:15:31,263 --> 00:15:33,849 This is how it'll look in five minutes. In 10 minutes! 325 00:15:33,933 --> 00:15:35,309 I don't have time for this! 326 00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:37,811 God damn it! 327 00:15:45,110 --> 00:15:46,987 That's the silhouette he chose? 328 00:15:48,697 --> 00:15:51,033 I get it now. I fucking love empathy. 329 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:53,994 Yes, we've seen soldiers surprising their kids at the airport, 330 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:57,498 and we double watched Scrooge. It expanded every heart I have. 331 00:15:57,498 --> 00:15:59,917 AISHA: Hold up! Got a message for Yum! 332 00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:02,628 Oh, my God! The town finally needs its moral center. 333 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,755 - Aisha, release us. - I don't think you're ready. 334 00:16:04,755 --> 00:16:07,257 Fam, I was wrong! Jerks have totally taken over. 335 00:16:07,341 --> 00:16:09,718 And only you assholes can save this town. 336 00:16:09,802 --> 00:16:11,553 Come on, Aish, we need to get out! 337 00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:13,764 Come on, sister girl! We're running out of time. 338 00:16:13,764 --> 00:16:16,517 AISHA: Jesus! You fucking aliens get into some stupid shit. 339 00:16:16,517 --> 00:16:18,519 Okay. We can skip to the final test. 340 00:16:18,519 --> 00:16:19,603 I ordered a pizza. 341 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:22,439 All you gotta do is talk to the delivery guy and get your pizza. 342 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:23,691 - Okay? - Wow! That's it. 343 00:16:23,816 --> 00:16:26,068 - Easy. Not even hungry. - Also, he's two hours late. 344 00:16:26,068 --> 00:16:27,486 What? Where the fuck's my 'za? 345 00:16:27,486 --> 00:16:30,948 Come on! You guys can do this! As of now, I believe in you. 346 00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,453 Ah! My Teen Titans collector vases. 347 00:16:36,537 --> 00:16:38,455 Let's get this over with. 348 00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:40,207 Hello, pizza representative? 349 00:16:40,207 --> 00:16:43,210 Yeah, I've got a pizza for Korn, Larry and Hackedy Sack. 350 00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:44,712 Call me by my Christian name! 351 00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:47,131 No, no. Calm your tits, Yumyulack. This can be done. 352 00:16:47,131 --> 00:16:48,215 Thank you. 353 00:16:48,340 --> 00:16:50,009 AISHA: Cute. Now, tip him. 354 00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,260 For not doing his job? 355 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,971 Come on! We gotta get out of here. The city needs me. 356 00:16:53,971 --> 00:16:56,098 Uh, does it go any lower than 10%? 357 00:16:56,098 --> 00:16:57,850 No? 10 is the bottom? Of course it is. 358 00:16:58,017 --> 00:16:59,351 We did it. Open the doors. 359 00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:00,769 Give him five stars. 360 00:17:00,853 --> 00:17:01,854 - Fine! - Fuck off! 361 00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:09,570 I can't. A perfect five star-rating means something, damn it. 362 00:17:09,570 --> 00:17:11,447 Okay, if I've learned anything today, 363 00:17:11,447 --> 00:17:13,949 it's that empathy isn't about doing the correct thing. 364 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:17,411 It's about skipping what makes sense to make someone else feel good. 365 00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:19,121 Come on. What would Scrooge do? 366 00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:21,373 He would think about what other people want 367 00:17:21,457 --> 00:17:23,834 and give them that, because he's actually Santa. 368 00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:26,170 Yes. Wait, what? Did you even watch the movie? 369 00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:29,214 No, I had my eyes closed the whole time. But I remember the poster. 370 00:17:30,049 --> 00:17:31,508 - Yes! - Hell, right! 371 00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:34,595 It's empathy time, motherfuckers! Let's get decent. 372 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:38,057 What the world needs now 373 00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:41,351 Is love, sweet love 374 00:17:42,770 --> 00:17:48,400 It's the only thing That there's just too little of 375 00:17:48,650 --> 00:17:51,695 What the world needs now 376 00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:54,907 Is love, sweet love 377 00:17:55,574 --> 00:17:57,451 No, not just for some 378 00:17:57,826 --> 00:18:02,331 Oh, but just for 379 00:18:02,331 --> 00:18:05,000 Every, every 380 00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:07,669 Everyone 381 00:18:08,462 --> 00:18:10,547 Oh, my God! I did it! 382 00:18:10,631 --> 00:18:11,924 All the jerks are gone. 383 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,927 Which means, I get to be the only jerk in town! 384 00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:19,890 What a fucking reveal! 385 00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,646 Whoa! Our town looks gorgeous! 386 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:28,690 Yeah, we empathized the fuck out of this place. 387 00:18:35,781 --> 00:18:38,200 In all my time as a Parade judge, 388 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:41,078 I have never seen nicer townsfolk. 389 00:18:41,203 --> 00:18:45,374 Surely the top 10 will include the gorgeous city of Geenadavisville. 390 00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:50,087 - Yeah! - Check it out! 391 00:18:50,087 --> 00:18:52,214 I'm giving this fountain a golden shower. 392 00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:53,465 JESSE: Oh, no, this is bad. 393 00:18:55,509 --> 00:18:57,136 Sorry. Please continue. 394 00:18:57,261 --> 00:18:58,387 Oh, my God! 395 00:18:58,387 --> 00:19:00,848 Did you just turn that man into coins? 396 00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,771 I love our family pics! Really makes this house a home. 397 00:19:08,063 --> 00:19:09,940 Oh, yes. Every time I walk by this picture, 398 00:19:09,940 --> 00:19:12,651 I'll remember what a total bag of shit that guy was. 399 00:19:12,651 --> 00:19:14,278 Fudge balls! After all that, 400 00:19:14,278 --> 00:19:17,781 I can't believe we didn't get listed in the 10 nicest places to live. 401 00:19:17,865 --> 00:19:19,366 We could've been on the cover! 402 00:19:19,366 --> 00:19:20,993 Nah, son. This cover is way better. 403 00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:23,078 "Town's Moral Center saves everyone's ass." 404 00:19:23,871 --> 00:19:27,583 Oh! One, no. Two, no. Three, no, four! 405 00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:30,502 Four recipes for creamy chowders! Yeah, baby! 406 00:19:35,716 --> 00:19:37,050 Ow! No, no! 407 00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:38,343 No, no, no, no! 408 00:19:44,224 --> 00:19:46,602 Halk! You came back. 409 00:19:46,602 --> 00:19:47,936 You know me. 410 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:49,146 Always the hero. 411 00:19:52,107 --> 00:19:53,442 They're way too many. 412 00:19:53,567 --> 00:19:55,527 The lighter! We can use the fluid. 413 00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,614 One... 414 00:19:58,614 --> 00:19:59,907 Two... 415 00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:11,960 Good teamwork, partner. 416 00:20:12,044 --> 00:20:13,086 What was... 417 00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:15,339 The floor! Run!